I have an admission to make: I like Andy Borowitz. I don’t always agree with him, but his satire appeals to me. He’s uses an equal-opportunity sword, slicing into Democrats and Republicans and anybody else when he thinks they need to be cut down to size. Today I share with you his reaction to the politics and human faces surrounding the latest immigration controversy.
Please read “Republicans Accuse Obama of Treating Immigrants Like Humans.”
Someone is to blame for the Sheriff’s shooting 13-year-old Andy Lopez, a kid out playing. Here are the possible guilty parties:
The 24-year veteran sheriff’s deputy who shot the Santa Rosa teen after Andy didn’t heed his commands to put down the gun.
The perpetrators of tragic mass shootings such as Sandy Hook and Columbine, whose actions slither into the minds of law enforcement when faced with guns and kids.
Andy, who waved the gun around playfully and refused the deputy’s repeated orders to put it down.
The friend who let Andy borrow a toy that was so realistic as to put Andy into potential danger.
The father, who told Andy several times to be careful but didn’t take the replica AK 47 away from him before he went out into public.
The manufacturer, who made the orange tip–indicating that this was only a toy–easy to break off rather than an integral part of the toy.
Society in general, which glorifies people using guns to kill in war, hunting, and stand-your-ground, and which encourages everyone to exercise his Constitutional right to carry a gun, have one on the night stand, put one under his store/shop’s counter, and collect weapons such as the AK 47 whose only purpose is to kill large numbers of people (unless you’re a hunter with bad aim and no intention to eat your kill).
Who’s to blame for the death of Andy Lopez?