Small Things Count

It’s amazing: some families of murdered people learn to forgive the killer, refusing to let hatred breed more hatred.  Their response to cold tragedy reminds us that forgiveness is the only way to reach the elusive “closure” that everybody talks about.  Execution and life-imprisonment punish but are forms of vengeance.  Anyone who has ever kept a grudge knows that “getting even” doesn’t make us feel a lot better. In fact, it empowers the person receiving our retribution, because of the time and energy we waste on thinking about them and because now we, too, have done something negative.  Besides, their terrible act and our reaction will haunt us all forever as we recall how he they their comeuppance and how we “got even.”  It’s a far cry from closure, which, by definition, brings an end, a conclusion to a situation.  It’s even farther from what people expect closure to bring them, which is peace. Forgiveness closes off the gut-churning blame process and doesn’t involve a soul-shattering battle of negatives.  Most importantly, it brings peace.  Forgiveness–what a concept.