It’s amazing: families of the people shot to death in a Charlston, SC church, during Bible study, are saying they forgive Dylynn Roof, the killer. They refuse to let hatred breed more hatred.
Hearing their response to cold tragedy brought me to a realization–that forgiveness is the only way to reach the elusive “closure” that everybody talks about. Execution and life-imprisonment punish the perpetrator but are forms of vengeance. Anyone who has ever kept a grudge for awhile knows that “getting even” doesn’t make us feel a lot better. In fact, it gives more power to the person receiving our retribution, because of time and psychic energy we wasted on thinking about him and because now we, too, have done something negative. Besides, his wrong act and our reaction will haunt us forever as we call up memories about how he got his comeuppance. It’s a far cry from closure, which, by definition, brings an end, a conclusion to a situation. It’s even farther from what people expect closure to bring them, which is peace.
Forgiveness closes off the gut-churning blame process and it doesn’t involve a soul-shattering battle of negatives. Most importantly, it brings peace.
Forgiveness–what a concept.